Even for someone like me, who is introverted and has the social skills of the average nerd, university was the most socially active period of my life. Most of my nights were spent with friends – either at the cinema, hanging around at other people’s houses – or at pubs, scavenging for free food in the way students do (or, at least, in the way we did).
Once I qualified and started work in general practice, this newly discovered social life ground to an abrupt halt.
I don’t need to tell any of you who have been through it yourself, but general practice is rather a shock for someone used to the student lifestyle – hours are long, the work is mentally, emotionally and occasionally physically draining and, if I had any free time in the evenings when I wasn’t on call, I slumped in front of the television when I had the energy, and went to bed when I didn’t.
I was a long way from friends and family, and that active social life I had been uncharacteristically enjoying vanished into the ether.
Busman’s holiday
On those uncommon occasions when I did have enough energy to do anything else at home, it was usually trying to be a better vet, given the challenges the job was throwing up at work.
When I talked with friends on the phone, we talked about our new jobs and how we were finding them. When I was with my then-girlfriend, who was soon to qualify as a vet herself, and her friends, we talked about work, because they all wanted to know how it was.
There were occasional outings to restaurants or pubs with work colleagues, of course, and they were fun, but they still felt… well, worky. Between the day job, the nights and weekends on call, dwelling on mistakes and striving to improve, work rapidly became my entire life.
Total immersion
I had thought this might happen, in an abstract way – becoming a vet isn’t so much a career as a lifestyle, right? I knew this already, but having it actually happen, having my job drive out almost every other aspect of my life, was very different to how I had thought it would be, those rare times when I had thought about it at all.
I believe some people can cope with this sort of immersion in the job – thrive on it, even. I am not one of those people and, although I may be wrong here, I also think such individuals are rare.
They’re the born vets, those much-discussed creatures in veterinary circles that universities are supposed to be attempting to pick out and snap up, to produce vets that can deal with the difficulties of general practice, instead of, say, accepting maybe general practice itself needs to change. Those people are the supervets.
For the rest of us, there’s hobbies.
Alternative focus
It may seem obvious that I needed to have something in my life other than work – it certainly feels obvious writing it down, decades later – but it wasn’t at all clear at the time.
It’s not just varied and interesting to have interests outside of the job; I believe it’s vital. It actually took me a couple of years to realise it and force myself to make time for it.
Now, because I’m a slightly strange human being, my interests took the form of delving deeper into geekdom; playing board games and role-playing games, finding local groups and forums online to discuss them; but honestly, I don’t think it really matters what it is – anything from horticulture to hurdling, from drag racing to dragon slaying. The only thing that matters is you can get excited about it and be passionate.
Nerd do well
I have made some wonderful friends with my hobby. It has given me things to think about when I’m trying to sleep other than wondering exactly what I’m missing with my difficult cases or what exactly I did wrong in the last case that turned out badly. It has given me joy back into my life. It has given me reasons to want to come home after work and, just occasionally, it has given me a reason to get up in the morning.
Part of me feels like I’m overselling it, but another part of me feels that I’m not. I think, amidst all the chaos and stress of practice, a hobby is like a lightning rod, grounding you and keeping you balanced.
If I have one piece of advice for new graduates, it’s this: get a hobby. If you have a job that means you literally have no time for one and you’re not a supervet then find another job, and get a hobby. Enjoy being a vet, and enjoy your Morris dancing, mountain climbing or extreme ironing, too.
And, if your hobby takes you in the direction of slaying dragons, I’d be very happy to join you one day.
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