Put your hands where my eyes can see

Theatre practice. It’s a funny world, the world of asepsis and sterility.

To an alien, the rituals we go through to prevent infection – our repetitive, obsessive attitude towards touching certain things after a period of cleansing – must seem very bizarre.

And this weird ritual continues once we enter theatre:

• Don’t touch anything unless it’s blue or shiny and on the instrument trolley.
• Don’t scratch your head.
• Don’t blow your nose.
• Don’t speak too much.
• Don’t move around.

The rules are endless, and all you want to do out of that list is scratch the itch that immediately occurs once you’ve gowned up. The intrusive thoughts start to appear:

• They’ve spent time scrubbing and drying, now go and give them a high five.
• They’ve gowned up, now give them a hug.
• Push their scrub hat over their eyes.

Ritual

It’s a ritual created through years of research and ultimate necessity. It’s a serious subject that our profession is trying extremely hard to dominate. The overuse of antibiotics in our environment has created a potential crisis and we are doing our best to combat our need to use them by performing gold standard theatre practice at the very least.

I recently took my children to my place of work and showed them the theatres and sterile corridor. When I had to explain the restrictions on what you should be wearing, who is allowed in these areas and the “clean” procedures that happened in this part of the building and the “dirty” procedures on the opposite side of the building, their words were “what a faff”.

And they’re right, it is a faff to the untrained and uneducated. But I love it.

Be observant

Theatre is a very stressful environment to be in. The surgeons must concentrate on the operation, the nurses must concentrate on the anaesthesia. You’re in your own little worlds, working independently but harmoniously.

But let’s have a laugh about it. Next time you’re in theatre, start to notice things:

• Who’s the first person to announce they have an itch?
• Who takes off a Croc to scratch their foot?
• Who rubs their head against the wall?
• Who moves away from the surgical site at speed to sneeze?
• Who is the first to request music?
• Which instrument will end up on the floor?
• Who is the first person to bring up a food-based subject?

There’s usually an interesting story about the scrub hat they’re wearing, so why not ask if its appropriate to do so!